Mother

Motherhood has always been one of my most revered dreams.

Just because I was not born as a woman, (or a woman-born-woman, as the radical feminist term goes) this would probably confuse or mystify or even shock some people to understand this strange craving. To be pregnant or to even visualize myself as a mother (or any other individual, who was not genetically born with a womb or as a 'woman') subverts the set norms of medical and culture history, its shunned as 'immoral' and even 'disgusting' "strange' and strings of other such bullshit but of course it does not bother even ONE bit in painting my heart out. I did a similar sketch sometime back, which is on this blog, called MOTHER and this painting comes several months after that. I am wiser, more blue like the watercolors and also, hungrier than ever before. The above art work is watercolors and mixed media (a style that I absolutely love and personally relate a lot with. I am also a mixed media, kitschy thing you know). Having a life, breathing inside someone, curling toes, winking lashes in your womb- I have never gotten over the visceral intensity of this. How insane is this. How beautiful is this and as a transwoman, a woman, I have always imagined something like this for me. And I know this sounds cliched, but really, a woman is so powerful and not only because she can create a life inside her, but even around her with such effortless grace. To all the beautiful woman, love and much more of it:)

Maybe this also comes from overly-hyped stereotype that to be a woman, one has to bear a child and for decades this has been a major tool of discrimination held against transwomen (and even gays and lesbians, for not procreating. Yes?). But this is not about trans politics and feminism. There are other places to discuss that.

This is for me.

There are my dreams. This is my world. My passion and night colours.